Monday, April 12, 2010

Roller Coaster

Last week showed me up close and personal that the grieving process is a roller coaster ride. I was hoping it was a steady climb up after spending more than a month at the bottom but, once again, I was proven wrong. My mother kept the family glued together in ways I discovered I couldn't even imagine and it's much harder than I realized. And I was knocked to the ground in a way I didn't expect last week and am still processing. I can attest to family members taking their grief out one another no matter how much they love each other. And personality characteristics you are aware of mentally are no less difficult to deal with emotionally when they actually manifest themselves.

Dad just lost a friend after a 3-month battle with cancer. Attending a funeral at the same church with the same children's choir and the same songs was very hard on him but also a part of his grieving process - that first is out of the way.

Work is still more difficult than I imagined but I am taking it step by step. That's the only thing I know to do - especially when it is more often than I like steps backward rather than forward. The end of the semester cannot come soon enough.

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